Disturbed

A familiar little voice came through my ear. While trying to open my eyes, I rushed to the door. There you were smiling and acting like nothing had happened. Well, yeah, nothing had actually happened. 'Good morning!', you delightedly greeted me. 'Morning', I greeted you in return. 'Want some soup?', you asked. 'Sure', I shortly replied. You hurried to the kitchen and I went pulling a chair to have a seat. Sitting with my both hands supported my jaw, I looked at your cheerful expression on doing the job. I'm not sure if this is real or you are just pretending. I wish you are pretending and I wish you tell me that you are pretending. You returned with two bowls of soup. 'It's a little salty', you told me, 'But I know you like it that way'. You continued talking but I was not listening. My mind was drifted away somewhere else... 'So, what do you think?', you came back with question. 'What?', I blankly replied. You stared are me and said, 'You were not falling asleep while sitting, were you?!'. Oh no, I was not. I'm not deft. Every part of body still function so well. I just don't wanna directly denying your request. I thought I've told you, I don't like my stuff be borrowed. And this time, you are not asking permission. You are telling me that is a good deed everyone would do. What do you expect me to say? I, of course, could not deny. At the same time, I could not lie myself that it is OK too. 'Uh...', I made. 'Yeah,...', I hesitated and continue, 'You can have it and if you need help, count me in'. I faked a smile. 'Yes! I knew you would say that', you happily continue your speech. But I could not hear it again. I turned to think of how a life could be such a sorrow.